This article on The Huffington Post about Anderson Cooper is an interesting take on celebrity infidelity, which I wrote about briefly a few weeks ago. Given my recent lifestyle change, I've started to look at things often similarly to the author of the piece, that perhaps when we see celebrities cheating, maybe it isn't cheating and that they just have an arrangement. I mean, honestly, they spend nearly no time together because of busy schedules in different locations, why would you want to limit yourself by being monogamous? I realize monogamy is the standard, though, and that it is much more acceptable to be though of as unfaithful than to tell people that you're actually polyamorous or in an open relationship. I do agree that it probably wouldn't be helpful to the equality movement of LGBTQ people to not only come out as gay, but then come out as non-monogamous. Just reading the comments of that article prove that, because it seems like people view non-monogamous people as sex-starved promiscuous degenerates who have detached emotionally from sex. It makes me sad, because that's not really the case for me.

I'll be honest, at first, kinda thought I was in it for the sex. I mean, my sex life has improved greatly and I'm thankful for that. But that's not really it. I realized that I truly can't enjoy intimacy without a meaningful emotional connection. That's the part that people are missing when they make comments like "Ah more gay propaganda on the healthiness of sexual promiscuity and detachment of sex from any meaningful emotion." and " But at a 50th wedding anniversary celebration, guests don't congratulate the couple for a life of sexual activity. That's just crazy!" That's just not what polyamory is about for me. I'm not detaching sex from emotion. In fact, I feel more meaning in the sex with my husband now than I did before. Just because we're trying to eliminate jealousy from our lives, doesn't mean that we are devoid of emotion. Also, perhaps at our 50th wedding anniversary celebration, we will celebrate a life full of wonderful relationships and love and our friends will congratulate us on that. I've said it before, it's not just about sex. It isn't not about sex, either. It's not about one specific thing, it's complicated, just like all relationships. Well, perhaps a bit more complicated, but I enjoy that aspect of it too. I like a little drama in my life. Not terribly bad drama, just light intrigue. Polyamory has provided plenty of that.

It just frustrates me, the way the mainstream views the concept of non-monogamy. It's so sensationalized and scandalized. My life is generally pretty tame. I'm not a degenerate, I don't do drugs, I've never had an STD, I have a normal job and am generally an upstanding member of society. But yes, I have multiple partners. And because of the way it is viewed, I can't share one of those partners with parts of my family, my coworkers and some of my friends because of the negative connotations it has.

I don't have a solution, obviously. I'm so new to this. But I wish sometimes that I could just shake people who think that it's such a disastrous lifestyle and tell them how wonderful it can be. Because it's pretty awesome right now.